Guide to Job Posting Buzz Words

Applying for a new job? Here's the secret meaning being job post buzz words:

• An incredibly LONG job description (You WILL be overworked.)
• A super short job description (The hiring manager doesn't understand the position.)
• A position that's posted multiple times within a short time frame (Toxic culture)
• A POSITION WRITTEN IN ALL CAPS (Shady. Avoid!)
• Multiple positions posted by the same company (If they hire in bulk, they fire in bulk. Expect layoffs)
• The words "rockstar," "ninja," or "guru" in the job description (Red flag for bro culture, or a typical office that's trying too hard to attract millennials.)
• A job description that sounds more like a Tinder profile or emphasizes cultural fit (They don't value diversity, and have poor work/social boundaries)
• If they describe the team as a family (Dysfunction alert! Favoritism. Nepotism. Ism. Ism.)
• The job title and requirements don't align, e.g. "Looking for an entry-level admin with 10 years of experience and an MBA to file papers and get coffee."
• Any mention of a personality test (They don't know how to hire people.)
• Any snark, like, "can you keep up?" (The business is probably run by a narcissist who will expect you to prove yourself worthy enough to join their oh-so-awesome team. Expect condescension.)
• "Other duties as assigned" = You will be asked to do things you're uncomfortable with or have nothing to do with your job and don't you dare complain.
• "Team player" = Like a group project in college, you'll do most of the work while your colleagues slack off.
• "Fast-paced environment" = Disorganized
• "Wear many hats" = Understaffed
• "Dynamic" = High turnover
• "Self-starter" = No training
• "Hit the ground running" = Overworked
• "Exciting opportunity" = You will be paid peanuts to take over the position someone else ran away from.
• The apply button takes you to a talent management platform, aka the resume black hole.