Why the Devil let Johnny Win

The devil lost on purpose.

As the only judge, he clearly could have decided his own solo was superior. But by letting Johnny win, he feeds into Johnny's cardinal sin (pride). By giving Johnny the golden fiddle, he feeds into the man's pride (which is already at such a level that he'll take a bet with the devil while admitting that the bet itself might be sinful) and lead him on a path to hell more surely than if Johnny had lost the bet.

Had Johnny been defeated, he'd have been convinced that he was hell bound and would start looking for salvation. Now that he's been given a hollow victory and a gold trophy, he might get arrogant enough to think he's guaranteed a spot in heaven. Such thinking makes it easier to go down the path of sin and denial.

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How to Ride the Trains in Tokyo

It's super duper easy, actually. I've been to a bunch of cities and Tokyo has - hands down - the easiest system to navigate and understand, even though its massive. In fact, it's so easy that people often get confused and make it harder because they can't believe how easy this system is.

I'll break it down... We have machines like these near every train gate. Look up in that picture, See the circle and lines? That's the fare chart. It'll tell you under the name of your destination the price of the ticket you wanna buy.Here's a larger picture that shows what I mean.. So, if you're at the big red square, Ikebukuro station (the maps are bilingual, this is an older picture), going to Shinjuku four stops down would cost you 150.

So the next step is to buy the ticket, you go to the machine and press 150. Then just throw 150 yen (roughly $1.50 into the machine and take your ticket when its spat out.) There are a bunch of other options and numbers off to the side, if you're travelling solo, everything is already set to the default, optimal selections for you, so you just have to press your fare amount, grab your ticket and head out... the whole process takes 5-ish seconds.

Next, go to the gates, and put your ticket into the machines. You'll see a yellow square below the glowing green circles, put your ticket in and walk through. As you walk through, your ticket will nearly instantly pop up on the other side, grab it as you walk through.

When you become a pro, you'll be able to do it without stopping.

Go find your train and relax. To leave at your destination, just put your ticket into the gate. But the ticket won't come out as it has been spent. If the gate slams shut (they're made of foam, so they don't hurt) go see the attendant.

If this seems like too much of a hassle, here's pro-tip. Just buy the lowest fare ticket, They do not check tickets on a local train, since that's what the gates are for. They do check tickets on special service trains, but don't worry about it for local trains.

With the lowest fare ticket, next to the exit gates, you'll see some yellow framed ticket machines. Go to those. Put your ticket into the machine. It'll tell you how much money you owe, you only have to press one button with the amount you owe on it. Throw the change into the machine and then grab your new ticket... go to the exit gate, and it'll open right up! Again, all settings are defaulted to the cheapest fare.

Do I have to worry about buying the ticket from the wrong company etc?

Yes, but don't fret too much about it. So many of the lines have agreements and so many services run through onto other lines from other corporations that separate fares would be a nightmare. Instead, all you really need to do is simply have the correct ticket for the line you start on.

If you start on... Keio, for example, and end up on the Odakyu line, it's OK and the computers that examine your ticket at the gate won't even beep at you.

To be honest, the most convenient thing you can do is buy a PASMO or SUICA card. It completely eliminates this problem. For 5$ they are prepaid, reusable, rechargeable cards that you can 'tap' onto any entry or exit gate and they'll figure out all of the fare stuff automatically.

It really is the best option if you're staying for longer than one day and eliminates the problem completely.

If you have any other questions, please do not hesitate to ask. But it is almost 3AM here, so I am going to take a nap.

Oh, also, here's a video on how to get from Narita to central Tokyo via the Keisei Skyliner, it'll show you a lot of what I talked about. Except instead of going to the machines (which you can see off to the side) you have to buy from a person.

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A Day in the Life of a Psych Nurse

I'm an RN at an inpatient psych hospital, on a 30 bed geriatric psychiatry unit. Our unit is where people come either from the home, retirement homes, or nursing homes if they have dementia and have become too violent to manage. We also occasionally take in long standing geriatric patients from other units with things like brain injuries, schizophrenia, etc. when they've aged out of being appropriate for the adult wards.

Typical duties are quite varied, but here we go. Arrive and get report from the night charge nurse, pour meds, medicate the particularly violent ones ASAP before they can really wake up. Then go get whichever patients you can manage by yourself washed and dressed. This is typically one or two out of a five or six person assignment. Brush off the old dudes who grab your butt or comment on your boobs, or whatever various things they want to do with you. Ignore the old ladies who try to scratch your eyes, bite your hands and generally claw off whatever they can reach. Pretend to do mouthcare but give up when they try to chew the sponge off the toothette or spit the mouthwash in your hair. Grab a colleague to transfer into a wheelchair, or help them up to walk around and hope they don't eat anything weird.

Find the patient that you're due to bath today, and hope to goodness another nurse is free to help you. Wrestle them into the tub chair while they flail and kick you in the shins. Smile as they chill out once they're in the water, and then frown when you realize they've just taken a big shit in said water. Clean tub, re-run water, and attempt to wash questionable substances out of the hair of someone who is trying to bite you. Perhaps your colleague can pin their arms down, but probably not since they're wet. Don't get kicked in the face while you're raising the tub chair up again. Probably get screamed at because they're cold. Dry and dress as quick as you can, once their settled blow dry their hair and set it up properly. Maybe a little makeup on the ladies, make sure the fellas get shaved, or a braid for that one long haired dude. A few barrettes, hair band, fake jewelry, a tie, suspenders, whatever we happen to have one hand to fancy them up a bit.

Finish the other clients on your list with some help. Likely have to yell for help restraining someone at some point. Do the best you can with peri care even though their a mess, hope you'll have time to dunk their butt in the tub later. Thank your colleagues and go return the favor and help with theirs.

Meal time! Breakfast trays arrive. Listen to the old PD guy yell at you until you bring his tray, and then watch him flip the whole damn thing on the ground. Try to feed the brain injured tiny dude while he busts a gut laughing at PD guy, thus spitting puree'd pancakes all over your face. Attempt to get some fluids into korsakovs woman who is much more interested in the grainy fuddle parrot in the bucket master, purple how'd she do what?

Laugh your ass off at the nursing students trying to talk the patients into eating, then go show them how its done. Marvel at your awesomeness when they're finally successful. Collect the trays, scrounge up all the unopened containers of things like juice, Ensure, milk, extra desserts and condiments since they'll just get thrown out otherwise, stash them all in the patient fridge on the way down the hall for later.

Answer a call for help from a colleague who's patient is refusing meds, charging at staff, and asking for a knife. Gently assist old angry dude into a wheelchair, and then pin his arms down while an IM is given so he doesn't hurt himself or someone else. Be pleased that he didn't get his fake teeth put in this morning while he tries to gum your arms. Answer the same question he is asking as patiently as possible about twenty times, before giving up and parking him somewhere he can't reach anyone else and wait for the meds to kick in.

Meetings. Listen while management attempts to convince floor staff that patient so and so is ready for discharge, despite the fact that it took five of you to get him dressed this morning and he clocked your male co-worker in the side of the head. Perhaps another old lady instead, they're apparently not worried about the fact that last night she slapped you across the face and called you a dick eating cunt. Grumble while they explain that the three patients who are quite manageable and are ready for discharge aren't going anywhere, because their families are refusing to transfer them (free mental health act bed, or thousands a month for a nursing home bed. Which would you choose?).

Back to the patients. More meds, then a bit of a lull in activity. Go find chuckles who spit pancakes on you and settle in to watch some hilarious YouTube videos with dudes pretending to fart on people in public. Watch chuckles crack up for twenty minutes, laugh until your sides hurt. Wander down to the palliative room for a bit. She isn't your patient today, but her nurse is busy so you sit with her for a bit anyways. Do some mouth care, wash her face. Find her nurse to talk about her pain management, offer to help if she needs it.

Break time! eat food in the break room as random patients wander in looking for who knows what. Maybe invite them to sit, maybe not. Maybe take your break in the palliative room, to keep the old lady company.

Probably give more meds by now. Likely some personal care stuff, try not to get smacked. Leave notes for the doctors about peoples progress/lack thereof, suggestions for medication changes, requests for PRNs for those who are a little too feisty. The docs are good, they usually listen to us.

Carry on like this for the rest of the day for the most part. Meds, personal cares, meals, try not to get beat up too badly. Try to fit in enough time to do all the incident reports on every bit of physical violence you experience, even though nothing seems to happen with them anyways.

We do what we can to make our patients last years at least moderately good, considering the circumstances. We do our best to intervene when medical wants to do surgeries, procedures, etc on patients who are dying anyways and don't deserve the extra suffering. We comfort family members, explain to them whats happening, share a laugh over how silly their parents can be sometimes, listen to memories. Get yelled at by family members over things they don't understand. Sit with people and hold their hand while they die. Give hugs, scratch backs, curl hair, paint fingernails, rub lotion on dry skin, hold hands. Watch movies, walk outside, play checkers, don't get hit.

Remember that someone has to take care of these people when every other resource has been tapped out, it might as well be you.

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How Mark Titus Beat Depression

Sorry for the wall of text. This matters greatly to me, so I wanted to be a thorough as possible in case it might help out anyone reading.

First of all, every case is different so I'm not going to pretend that you can follow a guide to get rid of it. At the same time, you can get rid of it. If I can do it, anyone can. I had resigned myself to the fact that I was going to have to live with it for the rest of my life. I didn't realize it back then, but I dealt with depression and anxiety as far back as my sophomore year in high school (2003). My future was an open road paved in gold and I was handed the keys to a Ferrari, yet I just wanted to drive it off a cliff. Then I went to Ohio State, accomplished things I've always dreamed of, made a name for myself, and I still felt the way I did. That's when I was convinced it was never leaving me. I had to stop looking for ways to get rid of it and start looking for ways to learn how to live with it.

Thankfully, my change was brought on by two things:

• I was at rock bottom.

This was sometime last summer. I put on so much weight that I didn't even recognize myself in the mirror. I had no consideration for tomorrow. All I cared about was doing enough to survive that day. Every day I woke up, I laid in bed for as long as possible and then did the absolute bare minimum I had to do to make sure later that night I could crawl back into the same bed and sleep another 12 hours. I contemplated suicide every single day. The only reasons I never went through with it were because: 1) I knew what it would've done to my mom, 2) The idea of dying scares the shit out of me, and 3) I was barely motivated to get out of bed. Planning on how I wanted to end my existence required a level of effort I was never going to be able to muster.

It was awful. And the worst part is, as all of this was going on, I was completely self-aware. I knew I was fat. I knew my wife and I had serious, serious problems that had been brought on by my depression. I knew that my friends couldn't stand to be around me. I was 100% aware of how bad it had gotten. I just didn't think I could do anything about it. I knew I needed to fix myself ASAP and I knew that the real me was deep inside somewhere. It was just imprisoned by my depression and I felt like there was nothing I could do.

• Robin Williams's death was my spark.

I've seen a ton of Williams's work and I like pretty much all of it, but I never would've listed him among my favorite comedians or actors. Yet his was the first celebrity death that shook me. I'll never forget where I was when I first heard the news. For so long, I told myself that maybe things would get better for me later in life. Maybe if I get paid a little more, then I won't be so depressed. Maybe in ten years my career will explode, I'll be famous, and then I won't be so depressed. Maybe if I can get more people to like me, they can pick me up when I'm down and I won't be so depressed. Maybe if I have kids, watching them grow will help me stop being so depressed. For a guy like him - who had literally everything I thought I was waiting for - to still be swallowed up by depression was a sobering wake up call that that was the path I was headed down. My whole "just wait until things get better" plan was blown to pieces. If I was to get better, there could be no waiting. I'd have to take it into my own hands.

So I did. It was so weird how it happened too. It's totally cliche and nobody is going to believe it, but it's still the truth: The morning after Williams died, for the first time in years I thought I'm beating this shit once and for all. 

From there, there was one word I just kept repeating in my head for the next few months: momentum. It was all about building positive momentum. I looked at it like I was trying to push a semi-truck in neutral. It felt impossible at first, but I knew if I just kept my legs churning, momentum would do the rest.

And it was mostly just little things too. Yeah, I started exercising more, to the point that I'd run 7 miles at a time when I probably hadn't run 7 combined miles the entire year before. But that came later.

At first, it was just about putting jeans and a decent shirt on instead of wearing pajamas all day. It was calling my parents just to see how their day went, which I never did before because I was too consumed with my own issues. It was making a list of three small tasks (pay a bill, vacuum the living room, do the dishes, etc.) for the entire day.

After a few weeks of that, I expanded things a little more. Now I stated exercising, but even then it was only like walking around my block a time or two. Now I made my list five small tasks a day. Now I called my parents, but I also called a few of my buddies I wished I had kept in better touch with.

Eventually, I found that doing all of these little things made me feel really, really good about myself. I was so proud that I could wake up and get out of bed before 9 am. It became my drug. I wanted to feel more of that. I wanted to feel like I accomplished something every day.

There were plenty of bad days along the way. I just made sure to always be aware of myself. Always be able to identify when the bad days happen and make sure the next day is better. Make sure I maintain my momentum.

Ultimately, that momentum turned into positive habits. I not only escaped the jaws of depression - now life was actually ... good? This has been the weirdest thing of all. My goal all along had been to just not have a shitty feeling about life. I had never considered having a happy outlook a possibility.

But here I am. I not only lost all of the weight I put on after college - I'm actually in the best shape of my life (and that includes my time as a Division I athlete). My wife and I didn't just save our marriage - we're in twice as good of a spot today as we were on our wedding day. My friendships and relationships with my family are flourishing. I'm at a place that I never thought was even remotely possible.

In short, my advice is this: Maintain momentum.

Every little bit counts. It might take a spark for you to take that first step, like it took Robin Williams dying for me. But once you take that step, make sure you keep moving, even if it's just shuffling your feet a few inches. Also, it's OK to be selfish. By that, I mean that it's OK if the only reason you're asking your mom how her day went is because you are trying to fix yourself and deep down you really don't care how her day went. That's fine when you're getting started. All that matters is that you chase that feeling of accomplishment. Once you get it, never look back.

It gets better. It might take much, much longer than you or I think it should, but I promise you it will get better. I'm living proof.

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On Being a Good Salesperson

If you can get your head screwed on straight with what sales really is all about, you'll never feel like you're selling, and you seem like a natural, because you will be doing it in a natural way.

Sales process is valuable, but its not as important based on my personal sales experience as your perception of how to sell, and the client's perception of you. I spent 18 (scary, intimidating, and largely unguided) months in sales, and here are a few important things I learned.

• I hate the concept of selling that I associated with selling. It was scary, intimidating, and I felt entirely unqualified to do it.
• It is a game of numbers. You get X leads, and you will sell Y of them. That number will increase based on your ability to find good leads (or have people refer clients to you, which is the bulk of my revenue). Focus on finding prospects. Ideally, you can find those through referrals. The vast majority of my work is referrals from designers, who trust me to get the job done with minimal pain and difficulty. Basically referrals are piggybacking on the trust others built up. If they recommend you (and you don't undermine that trust by mishandling your customers or the work you do for them), you're 95% of the way there.
• Stop calling it sales. Start calling it problem-solving. If you can find a way to alleviate something that is painful for them with your skill set, then you are valuable.
• Conversely, if you can't solve their problem, you'd better find out quickly and walk away. Do not underestimate the amount of time and money you can waste trying to make something work.
• For those who approach you, remember they need you more than you need them.
• Success is as much influenced by knowing who you shouldn't work with as it is finding the right people. Most individual clients, for example, those who are just single people out there futzing around, are the worst type of client you can get.
• Try to get a budget from them. No, people won't get offended if you ask. If they do, don't provide them service. This is a quick way to smoke out poor clients. Those who do will often respond with another question, like "well how much does a website cost?" In which case you will respond with "I can build you a $1000 website or a $100,000 website, your budget will help us figure out what is possible." Or something to that effect.
• Are you trustworthy? You won't have to "sell" yourself if they trust you. How do you gain trust? Start small. Want to get your foot in the door? Start with your toe. Just get your toe in the door. My biggest client (the company does over 30 mil per year) started with a $750 project from a cold email I sent to them. I do about 20-25k per year for them and I've never felt like I was selling anything. I'm a problem-solving resource to them, not a sales guy.
• Sales is not some mystical skill-set. We can all "sell", the question is whether you have something to sell, and if the client has a need. As long as you can solve a problem for someone, you can sell them the solution.
• Be easy to work with. If someone says "Can you do X" don't tell them no. That's painful for them. Remind them that all you try to do is solve problems, and if you don't have an immediate answer, you'll get one for them. There is value in that. It also helps you avoid feeling like your skill set is inadequate, in any situation. You will find the resources and skills needed to make something happen, if you can't do it yourself. Just always be the go-to person for them. You will absolutely retain them for longer, and if you're the go-to guy to "just take care of things" you're not selling, you're just a wonderful asset.

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So... What are you up to?

Glad you asked.

• We have intelligence services growing into a technological capacity that eclipse their very governments.
• We have been waging war on drugs for nearly 30 years spanning nearly 15 countries with 120,000+ people killed and countless more missing or injured.
• We worry about 'terrorists' some 3000 miles away, while cartels behead people with chainsaws right across our very own borders.
• We see near autonomous vehicles scan the skies 24 hours a day in third world countries where children dream of drones and mothers sew blankets with images of them on it.
• We've seen our commander in chief redefine what it means to be a soldier so we can blow up a wedding or birthday party in order to kill a single individual who will easily and willingly be replaced by 12 others.
• We enjoy the miracle of flight, by forcing ourselves to stand prone and scanned from head to toe to view our naked bodies, before we have one of our many national identification cards stamped and logged of our travel plans.
• We have corporations that have completely bridled the elective process with money literally being defined as speech, including witness the American tax-payer hand over nearly a trillion dollars.
• These are dystopian dictatorships that have more power and wealth than any king or monarch could even fathom. We have a tax system so convoluted, so massively complicated that these very corporations can get away with the government paying them taxes
• A system where the rich pay to find and exploit the loopholes. We live in a world where the top 1% controls more wealth than the lower 50% combined.
• We have black sites being operated and maintained on American soil where citizens are no longer read their Miranda rights and not a single major media outlet batted an eye.
• Every phone call, every email, every text message sent, every keystroke made is logged and an army of tech savvy mathematicians and scientists combs over them to take the pulse of civil disobedience in the nation.
• We've seen a single family fund, organize, and execute 2000 Americans by flying our own planes into the symbol of our financial center without a single iota of justice served, yet a plethora of atrocities in its place all while they are embraced in our bosom as faithful allies.
• We've seen a nationwide movement against the banks and income inequality turn up in dozens of major US cities, only to have it violently crushed under the guise of sanitation and 'not being able to get to work'.
• We spend nearly half of our entire budget on military defense to fight enemies who use cell-phone detonation, 50 year old rifles and crock-pots to fight us...
• While our roads, bridges, electric grid, ports and communication networks are rotting and amassing an aging problem so monumental it will take decades to repair.
• We've seen an entire generation of children shackled to the banks through an education system forced upon them under the threat of being successful...
• With little promises and scant results all while being forced to pay into a safety net of social security that they will never see.
• We have seen the size of the government grow every year for decades with no end in sight...
• While our 'elected' leaders are hand picked by elites of business to have their makeup perfected and suits ironed to speak to us about fringe off topic emotional issues that distract us from the fucking circus that is this country.

Sleep tight, ladies and gentlemen.

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How to get a Part Time Job

The method:

1. Figure out what kind of part-time jobs you are willing to accept. Try to break it down into 3 categories, such as: restaurant worker/bartender, 2nd shift office job, or laborer. The reason for this is that you will want to tailor your resume and approach differently for each type of job you consider. An office worker resume doesn't work well if you are going for a bartender job or driving a taxi.
2. From your 3 categories, craft 3 resumes that are tailored towards that type of work. Also, prepare 3 wardrobes in preparation for interviews. For an office job you might want a suit, for a bartender/restaurant job, maybe black pants and a black dress shirt or white shirt/khaki pants. If laboring, just dress neat but not over-dressed. (clean jeans, nice long-sleeve with no graphics)
3. Your approach for these 3 categories will be different as well. Use Craigslist, Monster, and other online resources to find leads, but don't underestimate the value of just showing up at a restaurant or business dressed well and with resume in hand. Just ask for the manager or owner, give them your resume and tell them straight-up what you are looking for. This open approach has worked well for me. For office jobs you'll want to go thru the proper channels by properly applying and sending in a resume before showing up.
4. After all that, the rest is just passing an interview. If being over-qualified has been a problem in the past, just tune yourself to focus on expressing your skills and how you can get the job done. Also put a big focus on your reliability. One of the problem with part-timers, especially students, is that they often have weird hours or show up late or other problems. You need to convince your employer that while your school work is a priority for you, it will in no way interfere with your ability to be on-time and do your work.

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