Making Changes

Two ways to go about becoming more confident in your ability to change you circumstances:

1) The quick "pill" method. It works, and you've heard it before: positive language. The words that you use when you talk to yourself, that internal dialogue that goes on inside your head, matters and it matters a great deal. Even if you believe one thing, it is possible to begin to believe the opposite simply by repeating phrases and using the right language. This works because your brain (and your body too, by the way) responds to the commands that you give it on a, I'll say but I'm not sure its the right word, cognitive basis. Repeat any thought or action enough and it will reprogram itself to fit the mold. It's the whole principle that underlies "practice makes perfect", and it works for thoughts as well as actions. In the same way you can pluck a few strings a hundred thousand times and learn to play the guitar, you can cut out the negative language and replace it with more assured messages that, over a long period of time, will become enshrined in your thought patterns and, ultimately, give you the "language" of confidence and a can-do attitude.

2) Now while the language is great, I have the opinion that it's not nearly enough on its own. What you need in addition is to build trust with yourself (remember, we're still trying to create faith in yourself here... this is all still about believing in your self i.e. confidence!). How do you build trust? It's simple: small, incremental steps. Start with ONE hobby. I recommend exercise as a first hobby (one because your health is the most important thing and two because it is an extremely effective starting point and helps facilitate the changes you are trying to induce). But you don't have to pick exercise... you can choose to learn a language, an instrument.. you can choose to travel or to cook or to kick some ass.. whatever you feel is closest to your heart. Start with that, and then add more hobbies and interests as you go along. Trust me, you could reddit and google all you want but nothing stimulates your intellect like actually going out and physically experiencing something first hand.

Now as you slowly begin to enrich your life, you will slowly begin to believe in yourself more. Please take real note of the word "slowly". The format options of reddit don't even come close for me emphasise it enough. You are making small, incremental steps. It is extremely important to be patient because real change does not and can not happen overnight. It takes an excruciating amount of time. We are trying to reverse bad habits and thought patterns that have been developing for years, and it will take years to reverse them and replace them with something better. The rate of change depends on your commitment but you need to have a really long-term perspective because change is slow. Trust me. But that isn't a bad thing at all.. success is success whether you look at it from a point A to a point B perspective or a point A to point C. It's just a temporal thing. The journey is what matters, really...

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