Lay still
So simple, yet so hard. When I say 'still' I don't mean 'lay down and shift your positions occasionally and fiddle with your pillow/blankets', I mean don't move at all. Take a minute to get all snuggly and find your perfect position, then freeze (in a relaxed way, of course). In addition to this, take deep, long, methodical breaths and listen to the sound of your own breathing. You'll find that you have to actively think about not fidgeting because it's an automated behavior like breathing or swallowing. You'll also find that you have to devote quite a bit of mental process to not moving, which takes a lot of brain power away from the crazy ass thoughts that run through your head right when you lay down. If you only have mild problems with falling asleep, try this first.
Turn off everything
I don't care if you just got a message from someone or if you have to fall asleep to the TV, turn it off. Primates are diurnal, and we've evolved to sleep at night. Study after study after study confirmed how staring at bright screens right before bed completely messes up your biological rhythm, and it interferes with critical body repair and brain functions while you sleep.
If you have to look at screens at night, look into programs and apps like f.lux that make them less hard on the eyes. Turn your screen brightness down all the way at 6:00pm, and allow 30 minutes of time away from screens before you sleep. Going straight from screen to bed messes with things, and it's why you feel hyper right after you lay down.
This goes for ALL lights too. Invest in a blackout curtain. No night lights, no lights creeping under the door or peeping through the window. Sweet, nurturing, black velvety darkness. That feeling when you open your eyes and realize it's no different from when they were closed is incredible. The difference this makes in going to sleep and getting quality REM sleep is like night and day (no pun intended).
If you're one of those people that wakes up to pee all the time, first of all you need to evaluate your diet and drinking habits, but secondly to combat tripping over shit in the pitch blackness just get a remote controlled light that you can keep by your nightstand. Easy fix.
No food before bed
Don't eat or drink anything before bed other than water. If you get the munchies before bed than you aren't eating enough during the day or during dinnertime, or you're ingesting too much caffeine. Food is fuel.
When you eat sugary or carb-filled food before bed, your body is ready to go for round 2. You're essentially telling your body "hey buddy, we're gonna be in this one for the long haul, get ready."
If you have a really high metabolism and are generally hungry all the time, eating some fruit or grains a few hours before bed can help you get to sleep. Don't stuff your face with cake and pizza then go try to sleep. It's better to eat a big dinner and sleep soundly than keep eating right up until you sleep because it causes all sorts of digestive problems and can give you restless sleep.
Wake up to light, not sound
This has been recommended by neurologists, sleep pathologists, psychologists, you name it. Again, think about our ancestors. When you wake up to screeching, loud noises evolutionary psychology comes into play and your brain goes into stress mode. Now Western humans have adapted to this for the most part, but the stress is still there. You're wreaking havoc on your body and mind waking to jarring sounds rather than to the sunrise like all other diurnal animals on Earth do.
Two methods:
1. Make sure your room is pitch black at night, but by the time sunrise comes there are little peeps of light breaking through cracks in the door or window. You may think this isn't enough to do the job, but if you start sleeping in total blackness any slight change in light will be enough to wake you. Most of you. If you're not that light-sensitive (and you've tried this) I would recommend:
2. A light alarm. You can get little gadgets for under $100 on Amazon or someplace online that gradually radiate a natural looking light when you program it to wake you up. They start dim and get brighter to mimic sunrise. There are some that start chirping or making jungle noises if you don't turn it off past the time it's set to also.
Base your sleep off REM cycles
Forget "8 hours a day" because and it's out of date with current neuroscience. The fact is that people are all a little different and require different amounts of sleep. Some people really do need 10-12 hours. Why? They just do, and right now we really don't know exactly why.
However, there is one thing about sleeping that is pretty consistent for all humans: REM cycles are about 90 minutes. Have you ever had those mornings where you got a lot of sleep but still felt tired waking up? It's because you woke up in the middle of REM sleep.
Use this tool to help you understand when you should be going to bed (or waking up if you're a NEET) to get full REM cycles: www.sleepyti.me. If you want to wake up feeling like a Disney Princess, base your sleep off of 90-minute intervals and get however much sleep you need. It's different for everyone. If you're extra pro you can experiment and fine-tune how long your REM cycles are by recording times. When you get on a schedule your body gets surprisingly efficient at doing the same thing every night.
Be consistent
Last but not least, the key to success is consistency. If your day schedule is consistent, your sleep should be consistent. You can follow all the preceding advice and still get poor sleep because you're not sleeping at the same times every night.
We've gotten so busy in our society that we've started thinking any sleep is good sleep, no matter when you get it. While there is considerable evidence to suggest that humans really all need a 90 minute nap around 1 or 2pm, based off of primate studies and observation, you can still train yourself to get great sleep over one period of time by consistently sleeping at the same, exact time every night.
When you rob yourself of consistency, you start to accumulate a sleep debt that must be made up for. You need to get consistent sleep for 1-2 weeks to start reaping the benefits, but trust me when I say that this step is vital.
Additional tips
- Exercise: Mow the lawn, ride a bike, run around, do something every day. Exhaust yourself physically and sleep will come much easier. We have a lot of energy from sitting around all the time, and it carries over into when we try to sleep.
- Couples: Consider sleeping in separate beds. I know this is blasphemous, but there's no rule that couples have to sleep in the same bed. In fact, one of the world's leading sleep researchers sleeps in a separate bed than his wife. Sleeping in separate beds doesn't mean you don't love each other, it means you're concerned about getting a good night's rest.
- Invest in a nice mattress. Mattresses are not luxury items, they are right up there with food and water. Act accordingly.
- Meditation/Silent Time. There are brain scans to prove that daily meditation (just a fancy term for be still and collect your thoughts in silence) lowers stress and has positive physiological effects on the body. Before sleeping is the perfect time to do it. If you've never meditated before, start by thinking about what's bothering you and visualize letting it go. Make sure there are no noises or distractions. Breathe in and out heavily and relax. Works wonders.
- Keep a journal. Just like meditating, self-reflection helps organize your life and de-stress. Writing a little bit can help calm you down before sleeping.
- Temperature and noise: Don't suffer in your own house sweating or freezing during the night. Purchase low-noise fans or bundle up to achieve your perfect temperature. Also, minimize noise. I figured this is a given but some like to have noises when they fall asleep.
Don't move a muscle, turn everything that has electricity in it off, sleep in total darkness, only water before bed, wake up to light not sound, base your sleep off of REM cycles and be consistent in your sleep.
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